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Post by 2Short on Sept 1, 2004 11:10:29 GMT -5
Hey...those first few menstruation years are rough, Pete. give her a break. she's bleeding out her orifices right now. it's tough to keep it all in the bowl when it's gushing out of you! Unless she has a **peesh-a-doo** on the back of her leg or her ass, there is no excuse for that. |
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Post by pete on Sept 1, 2004 18:53:21 GMT -5
i managed to find a bathroom that didnt have a bloody seat. it had blood spots on the floor though. so i had to avoid those spots. but at least im fine for now...
well im off to see Nap. Dyno. at 9 tonite!
first time seeing it!
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Post by ILaughAtSex on Sept 2, 2004 2:45:10 GMT -5
At my center for obtaining knowledge, there is a room for energy restoration. No, I'm not talking about a rest room.... HAHAHHAHAOMGLOL!!! I am talking about what I like to call "the cafe".
Anyway, at my table sits a very ugly child with an underbite so large it dwarfs the underbites of even the most underbitten creatures of the world. Anyway, if his brain were to be running at 9999999999% capacity, and mine was running at .00000001% capacity, I would still be thinking more efficiently than he would be. Yet he thinks it is fun to call me a "dumb shit", a "dumb fuck", a "dumb ass", and much much more! What is also quite the humorous, is that not only am I intellectually his infinte master, but I am physically so much greater than he is, it's not even funny. Yes it is.
He thinks I'm stupid because I am hilarious. In my fits of hilarity I happened to demonstrate how people act when they bite into a metal fork. The person to my left spat up water all over the person across from him, and the underbitten monster called me a dumbshit.
To close up this great story, when the underbitten one walked away for a moment I began to make fun of him. I continued when he came back, but would only refer to him as "he" that way the underbitten one didn't know who I was talking about. He laughed at some of the great mockeries I made of him. He didn't know what was going on.
I was the hero.
Moral: never call me a dumbshit; I will make you ugly and regretful.
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Post by unlimited on Sept 2, 2004 4:47:39 GMT -5
i managed to find a bathroom that didnt have a bloody seat. it had blood spots on the floor though. so i had to avoid those spots. but at least im fine for now... well im off to see Nap. Dyno. at 9 tonite! first time seeing it! are you sure she didnt kill someone? Thats an awful lot of free flowing blood to be gushin out..... |
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Post by Cheese on Sept 2, 2004 16:36:16 GMT -5
I crave Olive Garden. I crave it so hard. I get paid tomorrow... thank god. Hopefully, after paying bills and such I'll have money to GO to Olive Garden like I so crave.
I am so hungry. And I'm a loser because I'm writing fan fiction again... but its about who I used to write about! (mysterious much?)
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Post by 2Short on Sept 2, 2004 17:06:46 GMT -5
A penis is worth a thousand words.
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Post by Cheese on Sept 2, 2004 17:25:47 GMT -5
now now cal.... do you really think so? because I don't. There is no way you could get 1000 words out of a penis. i bet my vagina on it.
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Post by Macha on Sept 2, 2004 22:02:51 GMT -5
I made my first, real life lesbian friend.
She will now be my pseudo boyfriend (without all the sex stuff).
I can get that 100 ft away, thank you.
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Post by 2Short on Sept 3, 2004 1:19:37 GMT -5
They don't let you become Buddhist unless you wear sandals.
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Post by NonDylan on Sept 3, 2004 2:59:32 GMT -5
Should I feel bad for drinking all my 10-year-old sister's juice boxes?
NOTE: the current post is being typed while inebriated, and I have managed to maintain perfect grammar and not hook up with someone who's not my significant other.
snap.
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Post by sonshine76 on Sept 3, 2004 12:05:26 GMT -5
Should I feel bad for drinking all my 10-year-old sister's juice boxes? Yes, bastard. They were probably for her lunches and now she must go drinkless or purchase room temperature milk with her own money. Or perhaps since you took her juice, she should take your beer. I am quite Vicodened out at the moment and am currently multitasking at work and just drove around to get my lunch. I could've really hurt someone. By multitasking that is. |
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Post by Cheese on Sept 3, 2004 12:31:45 GMT -5
I made my first, real life lesbian friend. She will now be my pseudo boyfriend (without all the sex stuff). I can get that 100 ft away, thank you. Congrats! I'll be sure to throw you a welcome party when you cross over to the dark side of gayness (whether you are sober or not) |
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Post by sonshine76 on Sept 3, 2004 12:32:03 GMT -5
Now you have me craving Olive Garden's White Chocolate Raspberry cheesecake and Chicken Castellina with grated cheese, Cheese.
Pete, your sister is hemorrhaging. Call an ambulance. That's not normal. Thanks for the visual though.
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Post by LTrain06 on Sept 3, 2004 17:56:53 GMT -5
Today was interesting. he came by my cube not once but twice. the first time he actually had to ask me something about some work i had done for him. the second time, no lie, he came by to get a post-it. A POST-IT. he sits completely on the other side of the office, and has to walk through the office supply room to get to my side, so he was perfectly capable of finding a post-it note elsewhere. and when he came over, he sat against my cube desk/table thing.
also, yesterday, I had the perfect excuse to get a ride from him, and dammit, I used it! I made plans to see a friend in his 'hood, and we had all gone to an office happy hour thingy, so when it was time to go, I was like, "im goin in your direction and its a far walk, can you give me a ride?" he gave me a ride, we chatted, yada yada, and when I got out of the car, I go, "you've been doing a lot of favors for me lately, so let me know when I can do one for you." well not exactly like that, but close. Was that weird? was that suggestive? afterward I thought, oh shit, did that sound like I was offering head?
Thoughts anyone? I know you all really care about my trivial little crush here, but trust me, this stuff is important!
(no, its really not)
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Post by censored on Sept 3, 2004 18:17:20 GMT -5
Ltrain, you got in his car and offered him a favor. Hes expecting head.
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